In this podcast, I discuss the act of people pleasing, what it means to hand over your sense of validation to others, and the feelings of insecurity that are produced whether or not it succeeds.

I then offer you a hypnotic technique that you can practice on yourself at will to bring forward the emotions you choose using the power of your imagination. You might prefer to consider it a guided meditation.

When you observe & experience that the keys to your emotions are held within, you can engage with that more often and choose your response. There’ll still be times when you spontaneously notice feelings coming up that you don’t appear to have chosen, but this experiential knowledge can free you from the need to seek solutions in others’ approval.

*As this includes a hypnotic induction, DO NOT LISTEN WHILE DRIVING OR OPERATING MACHINERY.

Want to talk? Find me here!

https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

In this podcast, I discuss the act of people pleasing, what it means to hand over your sense of validation to others, and the feelings of insecurity that are produced whether or not it succeeds.

I then offer you a hypnotic technique that you can practice on yourself at will to bring forward the emotions you choose using the power of your imagination. You might prefer to consider it a guided meditation.

When you observe & experience that the keys to your emotions are held within, you can engage with that more often and choose your response. There’ll still be times when you spontaneously notice feelings coming up that you don’t appear to have chosen, but this experiential knowledge can free you from the need to seek solutions in others’ approval.

*As this includes a hypnotic induction, DO NOT LISTEN WHILE DRIVING OR OPERATING MACHINERY.

Want to talk? Find me here!
https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

#selfesteem #hypnosis #hypnotherapy #guidedmeditation

This podcast offers my thoughts on how to become your own therapist, what it means to transcend your own ideas, get out from your own fixed ideas and consider other options.

Want to talk? Find me here!

https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

This podcast video offers my thoughts on how to become your own therapist, what it means to transcend your own ideas, get out from your own fixed ideas and consider other options.

Want to talk? Find me here!
https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

#therapy #fixyourself

This is a personal set of thoughts about the slightly hollow sense of connection I find through social media: can you relate to that? It’s like looking for your keys under the streetlight even though you know you dropped them in the garden. Like every good distraction or avoidance strategy, getting enough of something that doesn’t work is impossible. And yet, it hints at the potential for just enough to continue trying.

The video doesn’t come up with any suggestions; it’s more of a call for comments and wonderment about how to scratch the craving for connection that social media can’t satisfy. At this time in my travels, I’d been off alone for quite a while, which undoubtedly permeated my thoughts, but I thought it worth honouring. I hope you enjoy it.

It was taken in the Devil’s Garden down a bumpy road near Escalante, Utah. The same day I met a mountain lion;)

00:00 Introduction
02:39 The human need for connection.
03:45 Social media: the safe, easy option that doesn’t work
07:07 Social media in the light of human needs

Want to talk? Find me here!
https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

#socialmedia #lonely #loneliness #connection #avoidance #addiction

Becoming (or, more accurately, reinstating) the authentic you is the act, as Carl Rogers put it, of becoming a person. I love this definition; you become a person when you finally understand what it is to be you; when you can name it, feel it and own it.

We are all multi-faceted, complex organisms in a complex world, so intellectualising will never be sufficient. The truth lies in experience and so every word in this video is intended to associate you with your feelings, complexities and conundrums. Because that’s what it is to be human!

This podcast draws upon my YouTube video (https://youtu.be/Ps2T2Cr4JoI) for its inspiration and builds upon it.

Want to talk? Find me here!

https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

What is peace? It’s all about accepting our experience, giving up on trying to battle the world to fight the system and embracing your part within it.

This is the first in several videos I will be putting together to help you improve your life and well-being. They’re my thoughts; inevitably, others will have different opinions! But they are genuine, heartfelt thoughts.

This one is about finding peace within yourself, what it means, potential routes to get there and how to notice when you are on or off track.

It’s not giving in or giving up. My definition of peace still has direction. It still has goals. But it’s less ego-centred, more in harmony with a world filled with awe-inspiring adventure. It’s funny, when you let go of your grip on your ego, you become a person. Go figure;)

Do you need to stop a compulsive habit? Maybe its gambling, buying, internet scrolling, social media addiction, binge eating…. the sky is the limit when it comes avoidance strategies. Human beings are fabulous are coming up with self-soothing crutches.

Is a habit affecting your life, or are you searching for ways to prevent a relapse into a self-soothing habit that seems to have a will of its own? Do you feel like addiction is running out of control? Are there guilty thoughts that reinforce the habit? Pacifying strategies almost work, kinda, sometimes. You are pursuing a goal through a flawed strategy: it’s impossible to get enough of something that doesn’t fully work, and so you do it to excess.

Sound familiar? If so, ask yourself what is the need you’re trying to fulfil. Or the pain that you’re trying to soothe. Or the fear that you dare not face.

There is probably a story inside you that the pacifying action is intended to absolve. We feel a brief burst of control that quickly dissipates, often to be replaced by a sense of guilt or shame.

Instead, follow the feeling. Look for the message behind it and go in that direction with a bucket full of kindness. Find out what the pain is beneath it and own it. Lean into it. Give it permission to breathe. Don’t run away from it. Embrace it. Hug it. Be its best friend. Hear it. Let it speak. And see if, in doing so, you can come up with different choices and different actions.

Because once you’ve stopped avoiding the underlying feeling, your perspective on it is free to change. And that’s how permanent changes are made: by changing your worldview.

I have a much longer (and less comfortable) video on the same subject here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7Suee3nVqU

Want to talk? Find me here!
https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

#avoidance #addiction #changeyourlife #lifecoaching #changeyourthoughts #compulsive #compulsion #addictive #quitsugar #quitsmoking #quitalcohol #quitdrinking #loneliness

How are your New Year’s Resolutions going? This video discusses the concept of willpower, its limitations, your needs if you want a strong will, and some methods to help you engage it well. I discuss some background information on our most up-to-date understanding of willpower, and then offer some strategies to help you get the most from a scarce resource.

Want to talk? Find me here!
https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

00:00 background information
01:14 you have a limited supply of willpower.
03:08 glucose, dieting and willpower
03:39 Goals, open loops
04:20 to-do lists
05:00 tidy mind facilitates creativity
05:32 overwhelm of excessive goals
06:13 Instead of using scarce willpower, build new habits
08:17 release your willpower for the things most necessary
08:38 Impulse control
09:29 goal-setting state vs impulse state
10:00 plan in advance; anticipate impulse triggers
10:20 cut yourself some slack. Expect mistakes.
10:50 arrange your environment carefully
11:43 Publicly state your goals
12:25 the virtuous circle of habit change
12:56 chunk things down
13:38 Higher goals for the greater good
15:12 Postpone pleasure as a tool to remain focussed
16:32 what do successful mentors do?

#willpower #willpowermotivation #newyearsresolution #motivation #impulsecontrol #selfcontrol

This video starts with a physiological experience that seems paradoxical. If you follow along, you can draw your own conclusions. For me, it offers a potent reminder of what it is to be conscious, what we think we know, and how we deal with our own perceptions, especially when they don’t square with our expectations.

Why would you care? Because this is the route to awakening, to stepping behind the veil of ego and starting to perceive that you are a participant in your own delusion. When we can make sense of what we conclude from our experience, we can begin to see behind that and connect with all around us, find a place in the world, and find communion with the universe. A broad claim, I grant you, but watch the video and see how you feel!

When a minor game can shake your assumptions, it opens a wedge on a different plane of reality that is, admittedly, less certain. But in being less specific, it’s also more accommodating, perhaps even more welcoming.

Want to talk? Find me here!
https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

#awakening #experience #reality

We have a slow brain and a fast brain, an analytical brain and a feeling brain, a left brain and a right brain… perhaps even a lizard brain, a mammalian brain and an executive-functioning neo-cortical brain. There are many labels, some of which are already discredited but continue to have currency because they’re so compelling anecdotally.

Whichever metaphor you choose, one thing is sure: we can overthink, lose track of our feelings, and intellectualise. And equally, we can over-feel and not check in with our critical faculty to see if we are interpreting ourselves “sensibly”.

That’s what this video is about: finding a balance between brain and body.

Want to talk? Find me here!
https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/free-clarity-session/

The books I mention:
Hare brain, tortoise mind (Guy Claxton)
Creativity: A Short and Cheerful Guide (John Cleese)

#overthinking #intuition

Offer here: One session to become a confident public speaker.
https://authenticlifecoaching.ch/public-speaking-one-session-solution

Do you need to make speeches but feel crippled at the thought?

Are there environments where you are happy expressing yourself but others where you shrink into a corner?

The subconscious aspects of business can limit us from reaching our potential. To be a confident, convincing and authentic public speaker, you need a powerful technique and an equally powerful mindset. Skills can be learned and rehearsed, but your mindset is critical if you want to speak naturally in front of a crowd.

Hypnotherapy is highly effective at building the confidence and awareness you need to be a credible and relatable public speaker. Often only one session is required to stop any tendency to freeze in the spotlight and enjoy the experience! Astonishing though it might appear, I have witnessed clients make massive permanent strides forward at work after only one hypnosis session.

If this sounds appealing, book a Zoom session today. Together, we will quickly and enjoyably reduce your stage fright. Then, the opportunity to stand up and speak will be a beautiful opportunity to share your truths with the world.

And if you want to learn more about hypnotherapy or my approach, look at any of my other YouTube videos!

#publicspeaking #fearofpublicspeaking